It was a dark stormy day, both inside the office and out. As the day ground us all down, I wanted it to end. Another patient was yelling at my front desk receptionist because she couldn’t believe she had a copay while another yelled at the medical assistant because she did not want to come in to be evaluated to receive a prescription for antibiotics.
And I poured through a stack of diagnostic test results when I caught sight of the one suggesting that one of my nicest patients probably had lung cancer. As I pondered how I would give her the news, Julie (name changed) walked in. She rushed to me standing near the phone and gave me a big bear hug. She told me that she just got her math test back and her grade was an A! I told her I was proud of her and I truly was. Julie was a 10-year-old who always struggled in math and I encouraged her that she could do it if she didn’t give up. When it was her turn in the exam room, we talked about her health but also about the fact that she could become anything she wanted to become. And I saw the light in her eyes for the first time about her own future. Before that, she felt stupid and did not believe it was possible.
I do not take credit for her good grade in math; she did that on her own. She just needed to talk to someone about it and she just happened to find me. It reminded me of why I am a doctor and how we can impact lives in ways we may never see. No longer was I depressed by the weather or in a foul mood because of angry staff and patients. Julie brought the joy of medicine back to me that day.
All too often in the medicine of recent times, doctors do not have time to develop such close personal relationships with their patients. Many feel like cogs in the wheel of the healthcare system, burnt out and bored. And patients are frustrated: they want to be listened to, understood and cared for. For many patients and doctors alike, the joy exited the doctor patient relationship.
It doesn’t need to be this way. But, it does take effort. The joy will not always come to us. In order to discover it, we must seek it out. After all, the most important thing in the world is on the line here: patients’ health and lives.
But, it is going to need much work and effort from doctors and patients alike. The rapid pace doctors are forced to work at requires alteration. Doctors need to take time and really listen to patients. And the system must allow this to happen. Patients need to understand that many happenings in healthcare these days are out of doctors’ control. Everything is not our fault and we are not there just to take your money.
Unless, both parties toil to restore the joy to the doctor patient relationship, we will continue along with our partially fractured bonds. Do we want to become a team again? Or is this just too much effort?