All too often, patients are frustrated because they feel their doctor doesn’t understand or listen to them. On the other hand, doctors are frequently overwhelmed by patient expectations. Doctors have many of the same issues, sick kids, chores to do, bills to pay, etc, everyone else has. Sometimes we may have to run out of the office for one of our children’s emergencies. I find that most patients understand this. But, there are still many who don’t expect us to have these problems and expect us to be there when they need us.
What don’t you know about your doctor?
1. When you bombard us with many unrelated complaints at one time, it is overwhelming to us. It is easier and more efficient for us to concentrate on a few major concerns at one time. This does not have to do with the fact that we are trying to push you out to see more patients or make more money. It has to do with our brain capacity. We just cannot focus on too many things at the same time.
2. When you call us after hours, we are not sitting by the phone to answer phone calls. I may be driving in my car or at my kid’s swim meet. I do not have your chart at my house. I will answer your call but I may not be able to answer your question at that moment. It is better to call me during office hours with these questions.
3. When you call in the middle of the night with non-emergent calls, we remember that. Many doctors cannot go back to sleep after a middle of the night call. We are trained to respond to emergencies in our sleep. If it is truly an emergency, call. We will help you. If not, hold off for a few hours until the office opens.
4. When you are rude to our staff, they tell us. I am often surprised when my staff tells me how rude some of my patients are. Because they are completely nice to me in the exam room. If you continue to be rude to my staff, I may ask you to find another doctor. My staff works hard and are not there to be abused. That being said, if you do have an issue with one of my staff, bring it up with me in the exam room. I will investigate and if I believe my staff behaved inappropriately, I will call them and ask them to correct their behavior.
5. We are not always going to give you what you want. I try to be a team player with my patients and help them make the best decisions. But, I also have to tell them when their request is inappropriate. And I am not a drive through where you can come and order whatever you want. A discussion needs to take place and if your request is reasonable, I will do it. If not, I will say no.
6. Sometimes I just want to go home. Patients may call just after we closed and ask to be seen. If I ask them to come back early the next morning, they get upset. I may have been in the office for 9 straight hours seeing patients with no break. I need sleep too. If you want an appointment at 8 pm, the time to call is not 7:59. Call early and we will make sure you are seen that day.
7. We often have insomnia worrying about our patients. As a family doctor, I get to really know my patients. I love them dearly and worry when they are not doing well. Most doctors are the same.
The doctor patient relationship needs improvement. I doubt anyone would disagree. But, it will only happen when both sides try to understand each other better.
